Off The Markley

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This is the New Homophobia

I was taken aback by a recent political ad from Texas Gov. Rick Perry, not just because the content is so vile and homophobic but because for years Perry has been dogged by rumors that he is gay. I don’t mean “gay” in the playground pejorative sense, I mean that he’s had to fend off… Continue reading ‘This is the New Homophobia’



GOP Debate Live: Where the Race Stands

Having just arrived at Oakland University for tonight’s Republican presidential debate, I noticed two things immediately: 1) Everyone knows where they’re going except me (After wandering around outside and getting questioned by several police officers who must have figured–despite my tie and nice blue shirt–that I’m stoned [already] or a terrorist, I finally found my… Continue reading ‘GOP Debate Live: Where the Race Stands’



Tune in: Live-Blogging Tomorrow’s GOP Debate

Because I’m well off the Michigan GOP’s radar, I was able to secure a media pass to Wednesday night’s presidential primary debate between such intellectual luminaries as Rick “I Mean, Live Free or Die? C’mon, How Cool Is That?” Perry and Michelle “The HPV Vaccine Made That Baby Retarded” Bachmann. As a thorough-going political nerd,… Continue reading ‘Tune in: Live-Blogging Tomorrow’s GOP Debate’



Jon Huntsman, You Crazy Badass Motherf***er

Jonny Huntsman, you wild, wicked, rogue, rebel, badass, crazy-as-a-shithouse-rat motherf***er. First you Tweet: “To be clear. I believe in evolution and trust scientists on global warming. Call me crazy.” Then you get on “This Week” and call Rick Perry a wingnut for saying that scientists have made up climate change to get funding and that… Continue reading ‘Jon Huntsman, You Crazy Badass Motherf***er’



Pulitzer Committee Should Consider Stephen Colbert (For Real)

“The Colbert Report” sits on a strange patch of grass in both the comedic and political landscapes. The little brother to “The Daily Show” and certainly the more uneven of the two programs, Stephen Colbert and his weird, hilarious conceptual shtick of playing a blowhard, self-obsessed conservative talk show host in the easily-ridiculed vein of… Continue reading ‘Pulitzer Committee Should Consider Stephen Colbert (For Real)’



You Should Be Scared of Rick Perry

Rick Perry has hopped aboard the Republican presidential primary, and I’ll predict right now that barring some kind of scandal or damaging revelation, he will be the Republican nominee with a decent-enough shot of beating President Obama to make any reasonable person more or less terrified. The Republican primary as it stands now is a… Continue reading ‘You Should Be Scared of Rick Perry’