There once was a time when I actually believed in the ridiculous notion of ‘Bear Weather.’ The idea that when the temperatures dropped and the snow swirled in Soldier Field, the Chicago Bears were unstoppable.
I mean, let’s face it, we’ve all seen the footage right? You know, the clip from the 1985 NFC Championship against the Los Angeles Rams, when Bears Linebacker Wilbur Marshall picks up Rams’ QB Dieter Brock’s fumble and scores a touch down. You can see it in the mind’s eye – or on YouTube – the image of Marshall, flanked by William “The Refrigerator” Perry, running in slow-motion towards the end zone as a snow flurry starts to fall. Thus was born the myth of ‘bear weather.’
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But let’s be real, as romantic the idea, and no matter what Otis Wilson barked on that day, there’s no such thing. If you believe in ‘bear weather,’ you might as well believe in the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny:
Sacrilege you say? Well, tell me, what’s the Bear’s winning percentage at home in December and January since 1985? And while you’re looking that up, what happened at the 1988 NFC Championship against the San Francisco 49ers at Soldier Field? What was the temperature that night? What was the final score? Oh yeah, and how many TDs/picks did Bears QB Jim McMahon throw that night. (Hint: his performance was Cutler-ish.)
In 1988 the ‘Niners’ dispelled the illusion of ‘Bear weather’, an idea that only the most deluded Bears fan can hold onto. A notion that compels idiots to go shirtless in sub-zero temps at games and kept the owners of the Chicago NFL franchise from PUTTING A FREAKIN’ ROOF on the stadium! Had the Soldier Field renovation included a roof, it would have proven more useful than it is now, making it an all-season venue and would have qualified Chicago to host a Super Bowl.
But noooooooooo…Bears fans hold on to this ‘fantasy’ of ‘bear weather’ and an imagined advantage over opposing teams that play in dome stadiums or warmer climates.
Oh wait, the Indianapolis Colts play in a dome stadium, don’t they? And who beat the Bears in Super Bowl XLI?
(As an aside, can someone tell me how both teams that the Bears faced in their two Super Bowl appearances have done better than the Bears since? The Colts are headed back to the playoffs and the Patriots have won, what, TEN Super Bowls? Yeah, I exaggerate, but that’s how it feels.)
Anyway, back to this thing called ‘bear weather.’ THERE’S NO SUCH THING.
IT. IS. A. FICTION.
I dare you, nay DOUBLE DOG DARE YOU to PROVE IT EXISTS.
Ah, but you can’t.
And for those who still cling to the notion, let the science nerd in me give you a scientific fact: when the temperatures drop and the winter snows fall, Bears go into HIBERNATION.
Kinda like our football team has.